him, so I'm afraid you'lll just
have to AIEEEEEE!!!Soft Chinese ballads in the background. An unfamiliar guy comes out on to the stage in sleeveless leather jacket, leather pants, leather gloves and shades>
Audience: HEY! What the?! Who is this idiot?
Joseph: Be quiet! Hume-anist said I could have a job on this show, so here I am. That's why tickets for tonight are at half-price, you nincompoops!
Audience: BOOOOO! We want our money back! We want Hume! Hume Hume Hume!
Joseph: Hush! (adopts professional host voice) And tonight's special guest is the latest agent provocateur at our Temple to Adrianic Atheism, the anachronism (boy I love alliteration) called WISDOM!
Audience: BOOOOO! And how the heck do you expect to do this show without a Vanna White or a Kira?
Joseph: DID I NOT TELL YOU TO SHUT YOUR FRIGGING MOUTHS UP?! (calms down) Tell us, Wisdom (chuckles), what are your thoughts after your visit to our lovely monument to free thought and reason?
Wisdom: And I find it funny, they do not see, or feel, or except God. Not in a humorous way, but in a strange way.
Joseph: Actually, old boy, we do "except God" from being an acceptable explanation for anything that happens in the universe. Also, I have it on very good authority that "God" cannot be "seen" or "felt", or even "known". That's what every Christian I've talked to has told me, usually as one of their last arguments for "God".
Audience: BOOOOO!
Wisdom: One of atheists big arguements: there is no logic that there is a creator because we have not seen any proof.
Joseph: (ignores incessant booing from crowd. holds it on "faith"
that boos are for Wisdom; "knows" that the crowd is now strongly behind
him) Bzzzt! There are logic routes leading to the existence of a creator or
supernatural entity of some sort. However, they are either founded on false
premises, or do not specifically support the Christian God, which I believe
is the "wisdom" that Wisdom is trying to introduce to us. Give us
proof - the bedrock of law and of scientific advancements - for YOUR specific
"God", and then we can consider the matter.
And none of your bulls--- about all religions leading to the same path - each
religion effectively declares every other one a fairytale.
Audience: BOOOOO!
Wisdom: Well, with attitudes like theirs, they never will have God show himself.
Why should "God" depend on, or need, our belief to "show himself"? Any material thing independent of thought should work, and should have effect, regardless of whether we believe in it or not. Falling into a deep, stake-filled pit should kill or aim us whether or not we can see the pit, whether or not we know or believe the pit is there. Drug-induced hallucination and the resulting fear and terror can kill a person who believes he's fallen into a deep pit. Falling into a deep, stake-filled pit should kill or aim us whether or not we can see the pit, whether or not we know or believe the pit is there, whether or not we are asleep when we fall inside. Are you suggesting, Wisdom, that "God" is wishful thinking? That's certainly what I'm suggesting.
Audience: BOOOOO!
Wisdom: But, their logic of how the earth started...is all therory. Nothing proven 100%...just a, maybe....... it kinda looks that way.....(geez!)
Joseph: "Theory" means a very different thing in science from
what it does in common language. A scientific theory is a hypothesis, but one
that is heavily supported by evidence and generally accepted by the scientific
community to be the one that best explains and predicts how things happen. they
are certainly much better than your unfounded, unsupported assumptions.
Nothing is proven 100%, because you can't prove a negative, thus strictly speaking
nothing CAN be proven "100%". However, the scientific "theories"
we have now are currently the best explainers and predictors of things. They
might change, probably will, because science invites criticism and controversy,
thrives on it, fine-tunes things constantly, is happy to admit errors (I refer
to science as a whole not to individual scientists). "God", on the
other hand, frowns on questioning, threatens you with eternal punishment if
you question him.
Perhaps if you already got your hands on some actual knowledge, and some understanding
of how science operates, you might attain some more substantial wisdom than
what you currently have to speak off.
Audience: BOOOOO!
Wisdom: Ok, so.....we have some therories here... But, answer me this, the average man gets up, goes to work, maybe after work, a movie... dinner out, or just a lazy night in front of the TV tube. We exist...we are just here by some fluke in our ecological system...hmmmmmm
Wisdom: Then why...........why.................... with this very exciting
existence...ha ha... do we only use 8% of the brain we were so lucky to have
had nature compose for us?
Seems...illogical...
Joseph: I'm not up on current brain research, so I'm not sure about the veracity of the 8%/10% brain capacity thing. But... why... does... it... seem... to... me... that this question should be rephrased and posed to the theists thus: " Why is it that a perfect God, Who made us in His image, and Who LOVES us!, should have us use only 8% of our brain, and smite us with all kinds of really, really bad things, like disease, plague, starvation, genocide, tyrants, the Holocaust, flies, rats, the church? "
Audience: BOOOOO!
Wisdom: I will tell you why...because there is much more to us that meets the eye. You are "taught" a reality since birth. Programmed, if you will, to think like the rest of the world.
Joseph: Please enlighten us, then, as to what it is to us that is more
than meets the eye. Could it perhaps be the strong inclination towards wishful
thinking that leads millions of otherwise sane people to be able to hold it
in their minds that "God will send most of us to Hell, but he LOVES us,
so better do as he says"?
And HELLO! How many churches and other religious institutions are there out
there destroying the minds of innocent little kids? Religion is the almost overwhelming
social disease people have had to struggle against, teaching their twisted "realities"
to everyone, programming society at large to believe that religion is necessary
for human welfare.
Audience: BOOOOO!
Wisdom: There is 92% of the brain not being used because humans, atheists or not, do not know exactly what our potential is. What we are truly here for.
Joseph: What we are truly here for is to make the best of our one live
because that is all we have; to value our own lives as well as those of others;
to live our lives as merrily as possible without infringing on the rights of
others; to increase human welfare; to be rememberd fondly for the good that
we have done, rather than for the heretics we have sent to the stake or the
subversives we have denounced.
And hey... if you have realised what we are "truly here for", then
you should be able to utilise at least 50& of your brain, if not all of
it. That would make you very, very intelligent. how about an end to worls starvation?
Or a cure for cancer? Or simply making a million US dollars appear right in
front of me in exactly one hour's time?
Audience: BOOOOO!
Wisdom: We have become perverse...we have forgotten, who we really are.
Joseph: Agreed. Theists have forgotten that we are first and foremost HUMAN, not slaves to some degenerate, bloodthirsty, anachronistic fervid creations of deluded, sexist, fetishist, vengeful, 4000-yr dead authors.
Audience: BOOOOO!
Wisdom: So, in the longrun............. atheists have become censorious to the extreme because they cannot even fathom a entity more superior to them... Therefore, growth stops here.
Joseph: Intellectual growth stops when something unknowable, "God", is taken to be acceptable explanation for the as-yet unexplained, and ultimate explantion for that which has already been exposed by science. Moral growth stops when human welfare is subordinated to the arbitrary commands of some invisible being, "God", and when His name sanctions anything, and when one can rest assured that as long as He forgives you you can look forward to paradise.
Audience: BOOOO!
Wisdom: Which is why, 8%, sounds just about right to me.
Joseph: And 1% is all that's needed to cling on to "God".
Audience: BOOOOO!
Joseph: (sweating, but still holding professional smile) Yes, folks,
I know that you are all crying out for Wisdom's blood, but unfortunately as
an intern I do not have the authority to him, so I'm afraid you'lll just
have to AIEEEEEE!!!
(Joseph and Wisdom fall down together into pit as angry mob rushes the
stage and bodily toss them in)
